February 2012
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I just made butter beer.
And it was good.
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After all this time?
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Playing With Telemarketers
I was at home the other night in the middle of my dinner when the phone rang.
ME: Hello.
AT&T: Hello, this is AT&T.
ME: Is this AT&T.
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T ...
ME: This is AT&T.
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T ...
ME: Is this AT&T.?
AT&T: Yes! This is AT&T, may I speak to Mr. Byron, please?
ME: May I ask who is calling?
AT&T: This is AT&T.
ME: OK, hold on.
At this point I put the phone down for a solid 5 minutes thinking that, surely, this person would have hung up the phone. I ate my salad. Much to my surprise, when I picked up the receiver, they were still waiting.
ME: Hello?
AT&T: Is this Mr. Byron?
ME: May I ask who is calling, please?
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T ...
ME: This is AT&T?
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T ...
ME: The phone company.
AT&T: Yes, sir.
ME: I thought you said this was AT&T.
AT&T: Yes, sir, we are a phone company.
ME: I already have a phone.
AT&T: We aren't selling phones today, Mr. Byron. We would like to offer you 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.
ME: Now, that's 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day?
AT&T: (getting a little excited at this point by my interest) Yes, sir, that's right! 24 hours a day!
ME: 7 days a week.?
AT&T: That's right.
ME: 365 days a year.?
AT&T: Yes, sir.
ME: I am definitely interested in that! Wow!!! That's amazing!
AT&T: We think so!
ME: That's quite a sum of money!
AT&T: Yes, sir, it's amazing how it adds up.
ME: OK, so will you send me checks weekly, monthly or just one big one at the end of the year for the full $52,560; and if you send an annual check, can I get a cash advance?
AT&T: Excuse me?
ME: You know, the 10 cents a minute.
AT&T: What are you talking about?
ME: You said you'd give me 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. That comes to $144 per day, $1008 per week and $52,560 per year. I'm just interested in knowing how you will be making payment.
AT&T: Oh, no, sir. I didn't mean we'd be paying you. You pay us 10 cents a minute.
ME: Wait a minute, how do you figure that by saying that you'll give me 10 cents a minute, that I'll give YOU 10 cents a minute? Is this some kind of subliminal telemarketing scheme? I've read about things like this in the Enquirer, you know.
AT&T: No, sir, we are offering 10 cents a minute for
ME: THERE YOU GO AGAIN! Can I speak to a supervisor please?
AT&T: Sir, I don't think that is necessary.
ME: I insist on speaking to a supervisor!
AT&T: Yes, Mr. Byron. Please hold.
At this point, I begin trying to finish my dinner.
SUPERVISOR: Mr. Byron?
ME: Yeah.
SUPERVISOR: I understand you are not quite understanding our 10 cents a minute program.
ME: Is This A T &T?
SUPERVISOR: Yes, sir, it sure is.
ME: (I had to swallow before I choked on my food. It was all I could do to suppress my laughter and I had to be Careful not to produce a snort.) No, actually, I was just waiting for someone to get back to me so that I could sign up for the plan.
SUPERVISOR: Ok, no problem, I'll transfer you back to the person who was helping you.
ME: Thank you.
I was on hold once again and managed a few more mouthfuls. I need to end this conversation. Suddenly, there was an aggravated but polite voice at the other end of the phone.
AT&T: Hello, Mr. Byron, I understand that you are interested in signing up for our plan.?
ME: No, but I was wondering - do you have that "Friends and Family" thing because I'm an only child and I'd really like to have a little brother...
AT&T: *click*
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Kittens all over my dash.
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My Utonagan appreciation post.
Look at how motherfuckin’ badass and yet adorable they are?
They’re like wolves
but dogs.
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Happy Valentine's day, John.
isavamp:
Pixiv ~
SOBBING
My kittens in underpants post was a huge hit.
I see what you all like.
Gave this bitch some kittens in underpants.
Bitches looooove kittens in underpants.
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magicwithoutwands replied to your post: magicwithoutwands replied to your post: How I see…
I could deal with that I think XD. I shall think about it~
I mean, it’s actually a good movie. Fun to watch.
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magicwithoutwands replied to your post: How I see my room: How I see my room whenever I…
….is it really that scary o.o I was gonna go see it by myself…but I may reconsider.
Depends. Some people need to feel some sort of threat to be frightened, like a slasher movie. Any thrill that comes from feeling like life is in danger.
This was more of a good old fashioned ghost haunting movie.
Not...
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How I see my room:
How I see my room whenever I try to sleep after a scary movie:
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Anonymous asked: Hm, I don't know what to tell...
basicallyfillinginfortheskull:
[Raises a brow.] If you can chew it and swallow it, you can eat it, therefore it’s not a ‘bad’ cupcake. It’s only ‘bad’ if it wields a butterfly knife and tries to take your wallet.
“Yo, essey, I’m gon’ cut you so bad, you gon’ wish I not cut you so bad.”
I gained 3 followers posting cute shit.
How come I post all this other great shit and I don’t get dick?
Damn.
Ya’ll niggas gay.
Here’s a baby deer.
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magicwithoutwands replied to your photo: GO ON WITHOUT ME
“SHERLOCK!”
;-; That makes me sad
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All these people on my dash complaining about not...
thekingwizard:
Just because it’s Valentine’s day doesn’t mean you need to have a date to be happy (unless you’re a case where you’re like that all year round, in which case, I am terribly sorry for you)
Get some candy, a blanket, a choice stuffed animal pal, and watch some rom coms (or Star Trek, or Doctor Who, or Supernatural, or all of the above) on Netflix.
Tell Valentine’s day to suck...
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fenofalein replied to your post: fenofalein replied to your video: teacup pig I…
I want a little pet pig ;w; YOUR TAKEN? WELL THERE GOES MY NEVER-STARTED LONG DISTANCE E-RELATIONSHIP /le cliff jump
No,
like,
don’t jump… and stuff.
(and i want a little pig tooo!)
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fenofalein replied to your video: teacup pig
I love your being. and this pig.
Your feelings flatter me, but I’m taken.
That pig looks available, though.
xD
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Since I have run out of being interesting tonight,...
magicwithoutwands:
Need some suggestions guys. I’m looking into buying some loose leaf tea this week, problem is I don’t know exactly what I want. I was gonna go for Tazo Earl Grey, but I kind of want to try new stuff!
SO, anyone have any favorites, that aren’t too pricey, please share with the class ^^.
Irish breakfast
darjeeling
any chai
gunpowder green
love tea. mmm.